Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.

 

Chapel at Damascus Catholic Mission Campus. This was a previous place for me of purification and saying "yes" to the Lord.

    "Then the Lord said to Noah... 'For in seven days I will send rain upon all the earth forty days and forty nights; and every living thing that I have made I will blot out from the face of the ground.' And Noah did all that the Lord had commanded him. Noah was six hundred years old when the flood of waters came upon the earth." -Genesis 7:3-6

    The great flood was the first of purifications that God worked for His people in the Old Testament. Made in goodness and called to goodness, humanity repeatedly turned to wickedness instead of the goodness God offered to them. So, repeatedly, God made ways to purify them, from the flood, to acts of ritual purification laws, to wars, to diseases, to miraculous repentance. The Old Testament is filled with the sad repetition of this stubborn pattern, with God's merciful purification only temporarily saving us, who so often turn to sin even when presented with the perfect fulfillment found in God.

    Only those who focused solely on God's mercy kept alive the hope of salvation leading to the promised ultimate purification in Christ. Souls like Noah, who "walked with God" and gave their yes to Him were purified in His holiness, and were brought to the salvation God had promised them. These people did not always live lives of constant virtue- repeated sacrifice and purification was needed- but their genuine moments of responding with a true "yes" to God's will is why there are examples for us in the faith. 

    When Jesus came as our perfect purification, He called us to respond with a complete "yes" to the mercy of His cross. He offered us a sharing in death with Him in the cross, and rising with Him in the resurrection, laying down our lives for Him with joyful and faithful acceptance.

    When this happened, however, the sinful pattern of the Old Testament began to appear in the New. Peter, one who walked with Jesus in the miraculous moments of His ministry, the one who said he would lay down his life and stay faithful to Christ immediately (John 13:37), turned to the comfort of a charcoal fire and the ease of denying Jesus when faced with the choice of whether to follow Jesus; yes or no (John 18:17-18).

    God has been revealing a common theme throughout this past year of seminary as this second semester comes to its close (finals week is happening at the time of this writing). Given the knowledge that following God in all things is the greatest and surest path of my salvation, the Lord quickly placed occasion after occasion in my path to teach me to say yes to Him always. When I did say "yes" to Him, the Lord blessed my time here with fruits of growth in relationship with Him, in greater communion with God and community with others. However, He made me realize often that it was only by His grace that I could ever have the courage to turn from sin, let alone to respond to Him with a genuine "yes". On my own, I will weakly turn from incredible goodness to sin falling immediately into the deepest pits of self-love... and into the bottom of Hell. But when God does not let go of me- although this is something of which I am completely unworthy-- I can then become His saint, His great saint.*

    After the Resurrection of Christ, Peter went out to fish-- a profession He felt comfortable and confident in, something He thought He could do well. His denial and abandonment of Jesus was weighing heavily on His heart. Working all night however, using every strategy He had (one of which was fishing on the left side of the boat), Peter caught absolutely nothing.

    "Just as day was breaking, Jesus stood on the beach; yet the disciples did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to them, 'Children, have you any fish?' They answered Him, 'no.' He said to them, 'Cast the net on the right side of the boat, and you will find some.' So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in, for the quantity of fish. That disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, 'It is the Lord!' When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on his clothes, for he was stripped for work, and sprang into the sea." -John 21:4-7

    Peter gave a humble yes to Jesus, and followed the command of God even when he did not know who said it, or why it should be done. When he had done this, however, and learned that it was the Lord, he prepared himself and jumped into the water to somehow make amends in service to the one whom he had betrayed.

"When they got out on land, they saw a charcoal fire there, with fish lying on it, and bread. Jesus said to them, 'Bring some of the fish that you have just caught.' So Simon Peter went aboard and hauled the net ashore, full of large fish, a hundred and fifty-three of them; and although there were so many, the net was not torn. Jesus said to them, 'Come and have breakfast.'" -John 21:9-12

    Again Peter found himself at a charcoal fire. Faced with the reminder of his sin, he followed every command that God gave him without any hesitation, and when he did so, not only did he receive great abundance, but the net did not tear-- he was sustained by the Lord in his humble work.

    "When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, 'Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?' He said to Him, 'Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.' He said to him, "Feed my lambs.' A second time He said to him, 'Simon, son of John, do you love me?' He said to Him, 'Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.' He said to him, "Tend my sheep.' He said to him the third time, 'Simon, son of John, do you love me?' Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, 'Do you love me?' And he said to Him, ' Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.' Jesus said to him, 'Feed my sheep. Truly, truly, I say to you, when you were young, you fastened your own belt and walked where you would; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will fasten your belt for you and carry you where you do not wish to go.' (This He said to show by what death he was to glorify God.) And after this He said to him, 'Follow me.'" -John 21:15-19

    Jesus, in a moment of tender mercy, gave Peter three opportunities to promise his yes to the Lord. Peter was distressed; Peter knew how weak he was, how easily he would deny and abandon the one who loved him the most. Jesus knew this; He knew how difficult it would be for Peter to follow Him with a daily "yes", even unto death. 

    However, Jesus nonetheless called Peter to follow Him, and in so doing to glorify God. By God's grace, by His mercy, Peter could give his "yes" and follow God with love if only he would place his trust in God's love. So Jesus called Peter, imperfect though he was, to God's purification for God's perfection-- the perfection of love.

    "Therefore I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, that you may be rich, and white garments to cloth you and to keep the shame of your nakedness from being seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, that you may see. Those whom I love, I reprove and chasten; so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if any one hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me." -Revelation 3:18-20

    Jesus desires for us to pray to the Father: Thy will be done; Fiat Voluntas Tua. It was Our Lady, the Mother of the Eternal Word of God, who gave an eternal and faithful "yes" by the Holy Spirit; Fiat Mihi Secundum Verbum Tuum.

"And Mary said, 'Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.'" -Luke 1:38

    Please, come, let us go to Jesus through Mary. By the protection of St. Joseph, who shared in the "yes" of Our Lady, let us give a yes that is founded upon God's grace, that trusts in God's mercy. Let us follow Mary in offering ourselves without reserve to be perfectly purified by the Lord, that we may be filled with God's holiness, that He may be given our very selves as His greatest glory. We cannot do this on our own, it is only by the mercy and grace of God that we can be brought to union with Him.

    With St. Joseph, St. Peter, and all the saints, through Our Lady, may we draw near in joyful hope to our merciful savior and Lord, Jesus Christ. Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us!

"Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will, all I have and call my own. You have given all to me. To you, Lord, I return it. Everything is yours; do with it what you will. Give me only your love and your grace, that is enough for me." -St. Ignatius of Loyola

    *The last two sentences of this paragraph are adapted from a prayer attributed to St. Maximilian Kolbe. However, I cannot find a copy of this prayer online to properly make a citation.